November 21, 2006

I'd like it if I could always feel like I do after that first glass of wine.
Still me--but waaaaay cooler.
I have my moments, both pre- and post-motherhood that have made me question my sanity. But I ultimately determine that I am just in the honest minority.

I have twin daughters who are 14 months old. I had them when I was almost 34 years old. I never thought (a) I'd meet as nice and good of a man as my husband and/or (b) I'd have TWO kids this awesome. It all happened so fast, and you'd think I'd be just completely in a state of euphoria after the last ten or so years. But having everything I'd always wanted came at a price.

I keep finding myself waiting for the other shoe to drop.

You think I'm negative? Unsatisfiable? Think again! Because deep down, somewhere in there, I am so completely fulfilled. And I guess on a more accessible level, that scares the CRAP out of me.

I know I could turn to certain pharmaceuticals for assistance, but they scare me, too. I mean, call me old-fashioned, but I try to make it all OK with a glass (or two) of wine each night, sometimes before the girls go to bed. Sometimes, I save it for after. It just depends.